The Red Pill

So Neo is uneasy with the way the world works. He's been searching for something but he doesn't know what it is. Something just doesn't fit. One day, he gets a FedEx package that starts him on the path to reality. He chooses to take the "Red Pill" and wakes up in the real world. All his illusions about what life was and what it was going to be are immediately and forever changed.

The Matrix - a movie I didn't see until long after it came out on DVD. Not being a big Keanu Reeves fan, I didn't bother with it until my brother put the DVD in once to show me how amazing his sub-woofer sounded. When I did finally see the whole movie, I loved it.

I've always been uneasy with how we as modern humans have been inhabiting this world. Picturing us as a virus to this planet seemed appropriate to me. But I faithfully plugged along in my seemingly normal life because that's what everyone did. That's what was expected of me. What else was there? Sometime late last summer I get an email from my husband containing a link to the LATOC site. Not quite a FedEx package with a phone - but it had the same effect. I opened that link and began reading. My 'Red Pill' came in the form of an education. Peak Oil. How life as we know it is going to change - drastically. Suddenly, all my visions of what my future will look like are different. Everything I've been working towards (because I thought it was important) now feels stupid. I feel like I've been welcomed to the real world and I'm walking amongst those still connected to the matrix. It's sureal, truly.

Some days it gets to me and I just want to scream. Other days I want to slap all the people I know who are not 'in' on this huge piece of information. Sometimes I want to laugh at them. Some days I wish I didn't know about it at all and I could just be blissfully moving along in my silly little oblivious life. The parallel to the Matrix is so spot on. There is no going back. Once you know the truth, there is no 'plugging' back into the system. All you can do is move forward with your new knowledge and make the best of what's to come. In some ways, being aware is worse than Neo's situation because we cannot just be removed from the 'matrix'. We have to live in it and watch it all fall apart, unable to do anything, while we are still a part of it.

Anyway, most days, I manage to just put the big picture at the back of my mind and focus on the things I can do right now. Today, these things are to call the nurseries to find vermiculite, plan the garden planting for this weekend and to get some things done at work.